10:10-12
The disciples are rather taken aback by Jesus teaching. In Matthew;s account (Matt 19:10) they declare that it is better not to marry! Jesus then says that if someone, whether man or woman, gets divorced and remarries then they have committed adultery. To be more precise, commits adultery against his wife (or husband in the case of a woman getting divorced). So what are we to make of all this, and how are we to apply it today? Before getting into the meat of all this, let’s first note the equality that Jesus assigns to the man and the woman. People glibly accuse the Bible of misogyny or patriarchy. Such people do not realise how radical the gospel teaching on male and female was in the equality of importance it assigned to men and women. Indeed, one of the reasons the gospel appealed in particular to women was the high value it placed upon them, and the high level of respect it taught men to have for women.
So, back to divorce. First of all, if we treat this in a legalistic fashion then I believe we are making a big mistake. Jesus was not so much laying down laws, as reminding us of Godly principles. And let’s remind ourselves of the context. Consider what the Hillel school (the easy-divorce crew) were doing. They would divorce their wife because they fancied a younger woman, they would do so claiming they were acting line with the Law of Moses, and so were a good Jew. When Jesus talks about adultery this is what He is addressing. He is saying to the easy-divorcer who was claiming to be a good Jew that he was in fact an adulterer, and a hypocrite, and worthy of all the penalties of the Law associated with that. And the same would apply to a woman if she sought to get a new man via the divorce route.
Next, there are cases where divorce is allowed, in the sense that it is a necessary evil. Jesus said the Law was given because “your hearts were hard”, it is not meant to be a desirable or normal action. It should be considered like amputating a limb. It is highly undesirable, but sometimes the infection is so bad that it is the only option. Because of our sin sometimes divorce is necessary. Now, this does not mean one partner has to divorce the other if the other partner has committed adultery. There can be repentance and forgiveness, and if that is possible then it is a good route to go down, but sometimes divorce is necessary. There are some who apply this allowance only to adultery, I think this is unduly legalistic and misses the point. For instance, if one partner is abusive, especially physically abusive, to the other, then I would say that divorce is permissible, maybe even essential.