4:30
“Do not grieve the Holy Spirit”. The Holy Spirit is not a force nor a “thing”, He is a person, the third person of the Trinity, and we are in a relationship with God. When we act in ungodly ways we grieve the Holy Spirit. For we have been sealed for the day of redemption. God has set aside a day when His work in us will be brought to completion, when we will be completely redeemed from all the effects of sin. That is the purpose in being saved, it is not merely a matter of escaping the penalties of sin.
4:31
So how are we to avoid grieving the Holy Spirit? We do so by getting rid of bitterness, rage, anger, bawling, slander and malice. Note the implicit assumption that it is possible for Christians to have these things! The Bible has a very realistic attitude about sin and the human condition. So if and when we experience these things we should get rid of them as soon as possible. The world system encourages us to form into groups and to hate people who are not in our “tribe”. The gospel encourages us to love everyone, including our enemies. This does not mean we agree with everyone, nor pretend that everyone is right. The world in its pathetic attempts to find unity is increasingly using the ill-founded concept of “hate crimes”, so if you disagree with someone, or say that their way is wrong that means you hate them.
4:32
Instead of anger etc, we are to be kind and compassionate. If someone does something against us, instead of going to war with them, we forgive, “just as in Christ God forgave you”. Forgiveness is the oil that makes the kingdom work. Without forgiveness any church, any plan, will seize up. For we all get things wrong, often unintentionally, sometimes deliberately. If the basis for a relationship is the other person never doing anything wrong, then that relationship is doomed to failure. Forgiveness is the essential oil of the kingdom.
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